Wanting chewing gum as soon as I get in the car. The right song.
A new pair of pants. A haircut. Lipstick. Seconds. Coffee. My phone. News. Woolies drop. Next episode.
It feels delicious. Like after sorting the thing I want I’ll be good, happy, baseline, satisfied.
Now, I’m practicing hanging back. Being on the other side.
I don’t want anything. Unhook from the impulse.
I’m laughing with my wanting. Nup. Just waiting here being easy. I don’t want it.
Then I can be. Begin. What can I acknowledge that’s already here and forgotten because. Boring.
More aware of sensory input means a more accurate presence. The ability to delight in the simple experience of living life. Reawakening this allows me to be less depleted, less at the mercy of whatever new ephemeral thing takes my fancy.
Whatever else this day has to offer it will be different when I meet it from this state of not wanting.
((Still want everything though!!! ))
Alas.
*Painting by Marcelina amelia/ Saatchi Art*
